BREAKING: Hannity Faked His Own Death To Help Catch A Terrorist
An internet terrorist calling himself “The Engine” has been infiltrating political action groups for months, intent on causing the destruction of our fair election systems. The closest anyone ever came was the name of a nurse who supposedly had treated him and sworn herself to secrecy. That nurse, Nancy Higgins of New York Mercy, was the only chance of catching The Engine in person.
Hannity, for his part in the hoax, apologized to his friends, fans, and family for putting through such an ordeal, but he was also happy to have done his duty:
Not many people get to play the part of American hero. I was one of the fortunate ones. My life was never in danger, they tell me, but you never really know. I’m just proud to have been able to serve.
Hannity also tweeted to NBC and CNN, who had reported his untimely death a bit…prematurely:
— Sean Hannity (@seanhannity) June 18, 2017
Jokes on everyone but Sean!